Who Should Write Your Child’s College Recommendation Letters?
Dear Parents,
Today, we’d like to talk about one of the most important yet often misunderstood parts of the U.S. college application process: the letter of recommendation.
In particular, we’ll explore who should write the recommendation letter for maximum effectiveness and what colleges are really looking for when they read them.
✅ Why Are Recommendation Letters So Important?
In the U.S. college admissions process, a letter of recommendation is far more than just an evaluation.
It gives admissions officers insight into what the student is like beyond the classroom—their attitude, character, and personal growth.
Colleges don’t just assess students based on their GPA or test scores.
Recommendation letters provide valuable context about a student’s personality, leadership, responsibility, teamwork skills, and work ethic that can’t be measured by numbers alone.
Highly selective colleges, in particular, read recommendation letters very carefully and often compare their content with the rest of the student’s application for consistency and authenticity.
✅ How Many Recommendation Letters Do Colleges Usually Require?
Most four-year colleges in the U.S. typically ask for the following:
- 1–2 letters from core subject teachers (Math, English, Science, History, etc.)
- 1 letter from a school counselor (this is often submitted automatically by the school)
- Optional: 1 additional letter from someone like a club advisor, coach, or activity supervisor
So, 2–3 letters are generally sufficient, but requirements can vary. Be sure to check the specific guidelines of each college your child is applying to.
✅ Who Should Write the Recommendation Letter?
The person writing the letter can make a big difference in how powerful and persuasive the recommendation will be.
Here are the most important criteria to consider:
1. A teacher who knows the student well
Rather than simply choosing a teacher who gave your child a high grade, it’s better to choose someone who can describe your child’s work ethic, class participation, perseverance, and personal growth in detail.
Sometimes the most heartfelt and impressive letters come from teachers who have seen the student overcome challenges or show deep engagement, even if the final grade wasn’t perfect.
2. A teacher in a subject related to the student’s intended major
If your child is applying to a STEM program (engineering, computer science, science, etc.), then a math or science teacher would be most relevant.
For liberal arts, humanities, or social sciences, English or history teachers are generally more appropriate.
3. A teacher who has worked with the student over time
A teacher who only taught your child for one semester may not have enough insight to write a strong letter.
A teacher who has worked with your child for two or more years, or has supervised them in both academic and extracurricular settings, can provide more genuine and personal insight.
4. A teacher who can speak to the student’s character and leadership
If your child has shown leadership in clubs, group projects, or community activities, a teacher who witnessed those traits firsthand can write a letter that demonstrates your child’s personality and social strengths—something colleges value highly.
✅ 3 Things to Consider When Requesting a Letter
📌 1. Ask well in advance
Ideally, your child should request their letter at least 1–2 months before the deadline.
Teachers are often overwhelmed with requests during peak application season. Asking early helps ensure they have the time to write a thoughtful and detailed letter.
📌 2. Provide supporting materials
It’s helpful to share a student résumé, list of activities, personal statement draft, and intended major with the recommender.
The more context the teacher has, the more personalized and focused the letter will be.
📌 3. Express gratitude
Writing a great recommendation letter takes time and effort.
A sincere thank-you card or follow-up message after decisions are released shows appreciation and helps maintain a positive relationship with the teacher and school.
✅ What Are Colleges Looking for in a Recommendation Letter?
Here’s a breakdown of the qualities admissions officers look for when reading letters of recommendation:
| Trait | What It Tells Colleges |
|---|---|
| 📘 Academic Attitude | How seriously and actively the student engages in learning |
| 💬 Communication | Confidence and clarity in class discussions, presentations, and questions |
| 🧠 Critical Thinking | Ability to think beyond memorization and apply ideas in creative or analytical ways |
| 👥 Collaboration & Leadership | Teamwork skills, peer relationships, and ability to take initiative |
| 💡 Potential | Long-term promise for growth, leadership, or success in a chosen field |
Rather than vague praise like “a good student,” colleges value letters that include specific examples or stories that illustrate the student’s character and abilities.
✅ Final Thoughts
As a parent, you can play a key role in helping your child choose the right people to ask for recommendation letters.
It’s not only about who writes the letter—but also about the relationship they have with the student and the substance of what they can share.
If your child makes the request respectfully, provides thoughtful materials, and gives the teacher enough time, they will likely receive a letter that makes a strong impression on any admissions committee.
We hope this article helps you better understand how to guide your child through this important part of the application process.
If you have further questions or would like personalized college counseling support, please don’t hesitate to reach out to us at Elite Prep.
👉 www.eliteprep.com/contact-us
We’d be happy to help you and your student develop a strategy that fits their strengths, goals, and dreams.
Thank you for reading,
Andy Lee
Elite Prep Suwanee powered by Elite Open School
📍 1291 Old Peachtree Rd, NW #127, Suwanee, GA 30024
🌐 eliteprep.com/suwanee
📧 andy.lee@eliteprep.com
📞 Tel & Text: 470.253.1004
🎥 www.youtube.com/@ElitePrepSuwanee
